Tag: self love

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Self Love Women's Empowerment

What Is Self Love?

The Needs & Desires of the Heart

what is self love

Hello Lovely,
I am asking the question “What is Self Love?” today because I see confusion and mis-information among women around self love and self care.

Self love and self care are not one and the same.

Self love is not taking a bath with rose petals, buying yourself flowers, or getting your nails done.

That’s self care.

Self care supports and emboldens self love, but it is not the same.

Self care is usually very outwardly and obvious. Someone watching you can see all the things you are doing for yourself.

Self care makes you feel good, feel important, feel cared for.

Self love, more often than not, is very subtle. It is often very inward.

Self love is choosing your raw, real Truth, in every moment, no matter what.

Self love is having very honest and vulnerable conversations with yourself.

Self love is learning how to love being with yourself. 

Self love is making the choice, over and over again, to stop looking outside yourself at what’s “wrong” and choosing to work on yourself, instead.

Self love is pulling your energy away from what you don’t like, and putting it back into what you want to see more of.

Self love is creating boundaries and having the backbone to uphold them, unapologetically.

Self love is prioritizing healing and calm.

Self love is validating yourself instead of shaming or minimizing your experience. 

Self love is going into your darkness, to bring yourself back into the light. 

Self love is self parenting.

Self love is self soothing and self tenderness.

Self love is radical self acceptance.

These are things that are not necessarily seen with human eyes.

Self love is an inside job.

Self love is a moment by moment intimacy with yourself.

Self love is a moment by moment creation of a life that feels aligned, meaningful, satisfying, and calm.

Self love becomes really simple once you allow yourself to feel and start identifying with energies, instead of thinking your way through everything. (overthinking is so heavy and exhausting!)

It’s living life by feeling from your heart, instead of thinking with your head.

Living a life that you love is not through doing all the things that you “should” or are “supposed to do” or that “make sense”.

A life that you love is found through self love.

Need help with learning how to live from your heart and allowing the feelings without judgement? 

Click the link below to connect with me. 

To Your Self Love Journey,

Suze

Let My Heart Be Free!

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Self Love Women's Empowerment

A Love Letter to My Younger Self

Before I Enter My New Beginning...

a love letter to my younger self 2

Hello Lovely,
In looking back over my life, I felt led to write a love letter to my younger self.

My soul signed up for a wild ride, this time around, and I currently feel like I am expanding into a new phase of my journey. 

So before I move into the next chapter of my life, I wanted to acknowledge what I have been through and the wisdom that I have gained from it all. 

Each stage of our journey deserves our full attention to the end, and I believe it is important to intentionally close out one phase/cycle  before we can fully move on and embrace the next. 

Enough of that, let’s get into my love letter to my younger self…

The prize is not the marriage, the kids, or the stuff. YOU are the prize.

Take your time getting to know yourself—your strengths, your weaknesses, and why you are the way you are.

Notice and reframe thoughts that are self-shaming or non self-accepting. 

Learn how to love being alone.

Become an expert in relaxing your nervous system and being very gentle with yourself.

Revel in the abundance that is all around you.

Prioritize your needs and become intimate with the way your body communicates with you.

Know that you are wasting your precious energy by explaining or defending yourself to people who do not have the capacity to see or hear you.

Notice the people or things that make you feel rushed and choose to slow down and move at your own pace.

Catch yourself when you think you need to do something to prove your worth and stop yourself immediately.

Wait for the man who is clear, consistent, and active towards you from the moment he meets you.

Wait for the man who values real over “perfect”. 

Wait for the man who patiently waits for you when you are working through the hardest times of your life.

Wait for the man who’s voice calms and steadies you and who’s chest is the safest place on earth.

Wait for the man who supports your unconventional dreams and believes in your ability to bring them to life.

Wait for the man who thinks you’re more beautiful without your makeup on.

Wait for the man who puts you on the inside of the sidewalk and always holds your hand.

Wait for the man who can be spontaneous with you and who loves to laugh with you.

Wait for the man who heals you with his desire.

Wait for the man who holds you every night as you fall asleep.

Wait for the man who knows YOU are the prize and shows you that he knows it.

You are loved. 

You are supported.

You are safe. 

Everything is going to be ok.

That is my love letter to my younger self. Take what resonates with you. 

If you are ready to dive deeper into your personal expansion journey, click the link below to learn more and connect with me.

Lovingly,

Suze

I Am Ready To Rise

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Your Capacity to Hold Space & Radical Acceptance

Validation is Love

your capacity to hold space & radical acceptance

Hello, Lovely,
Your capacity to hold space and radical acceptance are intricately linked and connected for your healing. 

In my FB group, Inhale Love, I have been talking a lot about the capacity of holding—holding big emotions and feeling through trauma responses.

The extent of your capacity to hold these big things is directly proportional to the extent of the healing that you will be able to access in this moment and, therefore, the degree of wholeness that you will be able to feel and embody.

This is clearly a huge deal.

So today, I would love to share some insights around the capacity of holding & radical acceptance.

Because without radical acceptance, you will not be able to hold as much as you would like.

Acceptance.

It is the state of releasing any judgment, any attempts to control, any manipulation, and need to “fix”, and wishing that things were any different.

This is a lot easier said than done.

But think about it—when you are venting to a friend, a lot of times this is exactly what you are looking for. A safe space to let all the “crazy” out. You don’t want her to try to change you. You don’t want criticism. You don’t necessarily want her to tell you what to do (unless you ask for it). You just need to get it all out and feel seen, heard, and loved.

So why don’t we do this within ourselves?

Why do we run, hide, deny, or escape our inner emotional chaos?

What might be possible if we decided to create a safe internal space for it all to feel seen and heard?

It is possible to find peace in the middle of pain.

But it’s only possible once we find acceptance.

Acceptance is found when we release the need to control, change, or fix something.

It is a choice to VALIDATE whatever feelings are bubbling up.

It is an irony, because in becoming aware of the feelings and fully seeing/validating them, we are able to choose to release them, in order to come back to our peaceful center. 

We can then drop into the present moment to find reassurance and beauty around us.

To strengthen your capacity to hold space and radical acceptance, you must blatantly and sometimes painfully be honest with yourself and your current experience, without trying to change a thing. 

This allows for freedom from shame–shame that is placed on women for experiencing “negative” emotions.

Choose to love and validate your feelings to stop the cycle of shaming emotional awareness and availability. 

Choose to find peace in the storm.

Choose to release, when you are ready.

Choose wholeness.

Choose healing.

Choose the queen, goddess, warrior inside you. 

For more on the subject of holding space for your emotions, join my FB group, Inhale Love, or check out my other blogs on the subject.

If you are ready for deep support and guidance on your personal empowerment journey, I am accepting invitations from new clients for 1:1 coaching with me.

Click the link below to learn more and connect with me.

Lovingly,
Suze

I Am Ready To Feel Whole

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The Irony of “No”

It's Not A Bad Thing

the irony of no

Hello, Lovely,
The irony of “no” is that it can actually be a really positive, good thing. I think that the word “no” has been given a bad rap, and I want to re-write that story!

There have been a few movies in the past few years that all focused around a theme of opening up and saying “yes” to life, and crazy experiences, but I think we need to give the word “no” some serious recognition.

I have a past of people-pleasing and codependency. I over-gave and self-abandoned until I woke up one day and didn’t know who I was anymore, and hit rock bottom. 

Learning to set and maintain boundaries felt really weird to me, at first.

When I had a mindset shift around boundaries, it started changing the game. (See “How To Create Boundaries”).

I realized that boundaries weren’t about “pushing people away” (fear!), but were about empowering myself by protecting myself from showing up as the “lower self”.

Boundaries are about radical self acceptance, and Love.

Boundaries create space to breathe, heal, and be held.

From this perspective, I created boundaries and loved how it felt.

But recently, I have been taking my “no game” to a whole new level. 

We receive invitations all day long.

So many people and things looking to get our attention.

What might happen if we were more selective in what we allow in?

What might we feel if we said “no” to thought patterns that are self-abandoning and defeating?

Would it be possible to experience less regret from settling for less when you say no and wait a little longer for what you TRULY want?

(This requires belief that what you TRULY want IS available to you and that you are worthy to receive it, but that’s a conversation for another day!)

How might it feel if we paused before saying yes to ANYTHING that comes across our path and asks for our attention?

How does the invitation actually feel? 

Does it promote the energies that we creating and prioritizing?

Does spending time with this person make me feel the things that are important to me?

Does spending money (spending energy!) on this thing actually help me or deplete me from where I REALLY want to spend my money (energy)?

Slowing down and asking questions before any decision–big or small, can add up to big changes.

We overlook opportunities all day for change because we forget that little shifts add up to big picture shifts. 

Start being more conscious of the thousands of invitations that cross your path in a day–from texts, emails, social media, work, friends and family. 

The irony of “no” is that it can liberate. 

Liberation from the things that keep you stuck in unhealthy  cycles that keep you small, unsatisfied, heavy, frustrated, overwhelmed, and confused.

If you are ready for deep support and guidance on your empowerment journey, I am accepting invitations from new clients for 1:1 coaching with me.

Click the link below to learn more and connect with me.

Lovingly,
Suze

I Am Ready To Feel Good!

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Women's Empowerment

How To Make A Man Desire You

Foundations for Feminine Empowerment

how to make a man desire you

Hello, Lovely,
The answer to “how to make a man to desire you” is really simple…you just have to desire yourself!!!

What exactly does that mean? 

It’s really simple. If you don’t deeply desire to be with yourself, or you don’t deeply desire to take the time alone with yourself to really see and love all of you, how in the world can you expect someone else to?

And if you can’t reveal all the parts of you to yourself, how are you going to be able to reveal yourself to someone else and LET them really truly see and love you?

You cannot have the relationship you desire, until you learn how to have the relationship with yourself first!

You have to take the time to romance yourself. Love yourself. Accept yourself. Intimately know yourself!

It is so easy to  distract ourselves with men that aren’t fully available or aren’t clearly and deeply desiring to be FULLY committed to us. There are plenty of those men around! 

And if those are the kind of men that seem to be circling you, it simply means that you have not yet become fully available to yourself. I strongly recommend that you read my article “Am I In A Codependent Relationship?” to see if codependency is the role that you tend to take on in relationships. 

You are hiding parts of yourself that you think are “unacceptable”. The parts that we label “too much” or “not enough” or “ugly”, or “dark”. You know what I mean! 

Another challenge that I see with a lot of women here is that they have not taken the time to really sit and be with themselves to be REALLY clear about what they REALLY want.

As women, we have been programmed our whole lives about what our lives are “supposed” to look like, or  if we achieve certain things, that those things will make us “happy”. 

What you deeply desire is buried deep beneath all the propaganda that we have been fed our whole lives. 

Take the time to know you, love you, desire ALL of you, and feel how to make a man desire you, by simply being you, the real you. 

You may also find help and clarity by reading “What It Means To Be Whole”.

For more on my story and my coaching, click the link below. 

Warmly,
Suze

Love Yourself, and Be Loved

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Women and Desire

Foundations for Feminine Empowerment

women and desire

Hello, Lovely,
Women and desire is a subject that is really interesting to unravel. I plan on writing a few Love Letters on this subject, but for today, let’s create some awareness around women and desire.

When you understand women and desire, things become a lot simpler to understand when it comes to feminine and masculine energies in relationships. 

Desire is a huge deal to a feminine.

Women don’t actually want attention, they want be desired.

Women don’t actually want sex, they want to feel desired. 

Like I always say, it’s the thing behind the thing, that you want.

It’s the energetic FEELINGS that you want, not the physical things. 

Women want to feel and be desired. It’s that simple. 

If a man is “chasing” her, he is proving that he desires her.

If a man is calling, texting, and giving her attention, he is showing desire. She has captured his attention and he desires to get her attention.

Women like passionate sex because it makes her feel desired. She doesn’t want a man who acts unsure sexually. She wants him to take control, to be hungry, to show desire. (In a respectful way, of course.) On a deeper note, this is very masculine energy, so this is very attractive to a woman with a feminine core. 

If you are wondering about your core energy, read my Love Letter, “What Is My Core Energy?”

I love to break these things down, because once you start to feel and live your life with energies, it becomes a lot easier to create the life you want.

The question is NOT “what do you want?” but rather, “how do you want to feel?” 

Identifying energies makes it a lot easier to get to the root of what an authentic life looks like for you. 

So when you think of women and desire from now on, recognize that this is a huge point of attraction for a woman with a feminine core energy.

If she consistently feels desired by her man, (and not just in a sexual way), she is able to relax into the relationship (trust), because she is will not be unsure/insecure about how he feels towards her. 

For more info on Feminine Energy Coaching, click the link below.

Warmly,
Suze

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What It Means To Be Whole

Foundations for Feminine Empowerment

what it means to be whole

Hello, Lovely,
What it means to be whole has been the subject of the day! I am so grateful for the work that I have been able to do today in teaching yoga and in client calls, and it seems that the constant subject is wholeness!

If you are on a healing journey or spiritual journey, you have probably heard that the goal is to be whole and complete, lacking nothing. 

This is especially significant if you are recovering from people pleasing or codependency. (If you are wondering about that, check out my Love Letter, “Am I In A Codependent Relationship?” )

Since my soul passion is helping women see and thrive in their lives from an energetic standpoint, I found a deeper meaning and resonance to being whole with understanding energy. 

What it means to be whole from an energetic standpoint is really simple. Being whole is simply a state of being where your inner masculine and feminine energies are healed to the point where they are balanced, and integrated together to create harmony. 

This means that you have healed the wounded masculine energy inside yourself so that you can create your own emotional safety and security, and this allows your feminine energy to flow. You allow your emotions to be felt, seen, and heard, and you know how to calm your own emotional waves, instead of repressing/suppressing emotions and feelings. (To learn more about wounded energies, reference my 2 Love Letters, “The Wounded Feminine & The Awakened Feminine”, and “The Wounded Masculine & The Awakened Masculine” ).

You are clear and know exactly when to be in your masculine energy, and when to be in your feminine energy. 

I hope this gives you greater awareness of what it means to be whole and helps you see the energy behind this healing work. 

This work is CRUCIAL if you desire to have a conscious romantic relationship with a like-minded, masculine man. 

This is inner marriage/harmony/union. It is an inner marriage of the masculine and feminine energies within you, that then empowers you to manifest the outer reality of a relationship that your heart and soul desires. 

To learn more about feminine energy and how it can help you create the life that you desire, click on the link below.

Warmly,
Suze

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How To Create Boundaries

Foundations for Feminine Empowerment

how to create boundaries

Hello, Lovely,
I’ve been going back to the basics with a lot of my coaching, and so, today, I would love to share my thoughts on how to create boundaries.

If you have a story like mine, and you are a recovering co-dependent, you are going to struggle with setting boundaries and maybe even think that you are being “mean” by setting boundaries. 

First, let me share a perspective shift around boundaries that started changing everything for me with creating boundaries. 

Boundaries really have nothing to do with the other person. You aren’t actually pushing someone away, or being “mean” to someone. Creating/setting boundaries is entirely about protecting yourself from you–the people pleaser/co-dependent you.

Keep that in mind as we work through this process.

  1. Once you have recognized that a boundary needs to be created with someone, you must be willing to take responsibility for it. Communicate that you feel uncomfortable with the issue at hand. Use “I” statements, and avoid pointing the finger at the other person with “you” statements.
  2. State what YOU are going to do to set the boundary. Are you going to end the conversation? Are you going to walk away? Do not expect the other person to do something to create the space and boundary. YOU decide what happens, and you honor yourself by following through on it. 

Remember that I said you are protecting yourself from you. You are creating space for yourself so that you can calm and center yourself. You are taking responsibility for your emotions and your actions. How the other person reacts is none of your business. 

Creating space for yourself to heal and nurture yourself is super important. You may also like to read another one of my Love Letters, “Why Creating Space Is Everything” 

Knowing how to create boundaries is something that may feel a little weird at first, but will become something that helps you stop feeling stuck, powerless, guilty, and/or shamed. That is freedom from co-dependency! 

To learn more about feminine energy and how it can help you create the life that you desire, click on the link below.

Warmly,
Suze

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5 Steps To Activate Feminine Energy

Finding Flow & Freedom

5 steps to activate feminine energy

Hello, Lovely,
In honoring the realignment energy of this New Moon today, I thought I would go back to the basics and discuss 5 steps to activate feminine energy.

In my experience, I have found that activating my feminine energy is an on-going awareness and choice. So it’s always good to revisit this topic.

  1. Slow down. If I only had a dollar for every time I said that! Ha! But seriously, it really is step one for everything here.
  2. Allow yourself to FEEL your body. Lose sense of thoughts and feel the sensations in your body. Notice how it feels to have your feet on the floor, your heart beating, your breath moving in your body. Just FEEL!
  3. Move your body. Without thinking about what it looks like, move, flow, and dance in whatever way your heart desires! Develop a sense of wonder and appreciation for how magical it feels to move your body!
  4. Let go of tension. Notice the parts of your body that are tight, closed down, rigid, and tense. Open your hands, unclench your jaw, and allow yourself to feel free, open, and relaxed in your body.
  5. Start communicating how you FEEL, instead of what you THINK. Use your vulnerable communication as an invitation for others to come deeper into connection with you. 

These are the basic 5 steps to activate your feminine energy. I hope it helped create some really clear ideas of how to start allowing your feminine energy to flow. 

For more information on my Feminine Energy Coaching, click on the link below. 

Warmly,
Suze

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3 Steps To Start Loving Your Body

Finding Value

3 steps to start loving your body

Hello, Lovely,
Today I would love to share 3 steps to start loving your body.

My journey started with healing my physical body, and over the years, I have seen how physical issues are often the starting point for women. 

How we view our bodies is a very complex thing. There is so much pressure and so much shame and judgement all around us, affecting how we feel and view our bodies. We realize that we must learn to see ourselves differently, to feel more confident and have high self worth. 

Learning to love your body is something that I love to speak on in my coaching, and I often incorporate it into my yoga classes, but for now, let’s just keep it simple with 3 steps to start loving your body now.

  1. Find gratitude. Take breaks in your day to review all that you have accomplished, and all that your body has literally done for you. We use our hands and feet all day long, and so often these body parts get overlooked and completely taken for granted. Notice all the magical things your body does for you every moment and start to say “Thank you” to specific body parts. Thank your mouth for feeding you. Thank your feet for carrying you. Thank your eyes for guiding you and giving you color in your world! Stop taking yourself for granted!!!
  2. Listen. Too often, we live on auto-pilot. We force our bodies to live out of habit, and don’t slow down to drop in and see what our bodies are actually telling us. When you take a moment for your gratitude, also check and see how you actually feel. Are there any body parts that feel sore, or tense, or nervous? Our bodies are incredible at communicating with us, but we don’t listen nearly often enough. 
  3. Respect. Once you create a new habit of listening, turn that into respect by choosing actions that show your body you value it. When you are eating, stop the moment you feel satisfied, instead of overeating and feeling “full”. When you are working and realize you feel heavy/tired, take a moment to stretch and breathe to release the overwhelm. When you notice that you feel rigid or tense somewhere, open the body and let go of the tension. 

When you think about it, it’s exactly the same as how we want to be treated in our romantic relationships. We want to feel seen, heard, respected, and valued. 

Why would our relationship with our body be any different?

I hope these 3 steps to start loving your body were helpful to you. Feeling your body and choosing to act differently with your body starts a chain reaction that can transform all of your life, if you allow it to. 

To learn more about changing your life through embracing feminine energy, click the link below. 

May you choose to set yourself free with Love. 

Sincerely Yours,
Suze

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